me – Page 4 – Right Turn without Signaling

No Regrets

“We all make mistakes, have struggles, and even regret things in our past. But you are not your mistakes, you are not your struggles, and you are here NOW with the power to shape your day and your future.” ― Steve Maraboli, Unapologetically You: Reflections on Life and the Human Experience My main word to describe how I…

Sick Day

knock knock knock “What?” “I got sick again.” UGH!! I heard G get up to say something to Indigo, and I sat up myself – then grabbed onto the edge of the bed as the world started spinning. Fuck. After he got her settled, I grabbed the empty water glass next on the ledge next…

Lighter

“My heart is lighter for it.” Truer words have not been sent via text message. It’s amazing what a few hours, a good open conversation, by two people who hate things where they were can do to lighten the heart. It really IS too bad we didn’t have this conversation sooner. But I think, emotions…

Hard

Sometimes it is just hard. It’s hard to think. It’s hard to feel. It’s hard to figure things out. And given the season – I feel it is compounded – by crowds, by not being able to find things I need, by not having enough time. I don’t know. My feelings are so jumbled sometimes…

I Hate My Subconscious

I seriously do. What it tries to tell me in my fucked up dreams I have – ones I remember vividly, so I know I should pay attention – well, it’s like it wants to poke me with a stick. My dream last night was full of weird images – frisking to get a driver’s…

I Wish

I wish I could look at him and not have my heart go into my throat and my eyes get watery. I wish I could talk to him. I wish I could be in the same area where I don’t feel like I am constantly avoiding him – constantly avoiding him because I want to…

I Am Kinky, Kinky Am I

(listen to this – and you’ll understand what prompted this post) My mom was a horrible person. Not really, but given how she hooked me on certain books when I was a teen – she was a horrible, horrible person. I remember when she found a book she had loved as a teen. Rosemary Rogers…

Home Again, Home Again

As the title implies, we are home. Home from the crazy ass trip with the four generations of family on G’s side. Home after the roller coaster ride that only that family seems to be able to bring – and where no amount of screaming is going to make the twists and turns any better…

Haunted and Other Ramblings

I hate dreams that haunt you. Dreams that stick with you even after you wake up – you relive them when the brain is idle – that dream creeps into your consciousness from your subconscious like a cat walking into a room – quiet and unexpectedly. I dreamed of him the other morning. I dreamed…

Cold & A Soak

Cold. Cold that is felt in your bones. Cold that isn’t just from the environment – the weather – but from the way you are feeling. That is the cold that has been settled in my bones. That is the cold that no matter what I do – how many blankets – how many fires…