A former cohort of mine who I am connected with on Facebook posted this and an accompanying article today. And it was pretty eye opening. Both of them. Here is the article.
It made me realize as I was reading it how many times people around me – including me – can’t disconnect. And if someone manages to disconnect, the amount of work that person needs to do to reset expectations about availability. I recall sitting at a bar, waiting for a munch to start, and seeing a line of people with a drink in front of them all looking at their smart phones. No interaction with other people. Just sitting there ignoring the world in lieu of their phone.
I watch the amount of drama that can erupt on-line. It used to just happen on blogs. Now it is blogs, tumblr, twitter, facebook, fetlife, and the countless other social media places. People are using texts instead of phone calls. Email instead of calling to the person next to them to ask a question. And watching how utterly upset people get by it all just kills me. Everyone’s lives are intermingled with the technology and information that no one seems to be able to separate it. Myself included at times. I react to things I read – messages not returned.
At another point today, I was reading a post on Fetlife someone had made to a forum. She were feeling abandoned because her Daddy didn’t always return her texts messages promptly. She assumed the worst – that something was wrong with their relationship, etc. After much support from her fellow babygirls, someone finally said the obvious “you admit you message him while he’s working – he may be delayed because he is distracted by work and unable to get back to you.”
There are times lately that I am putting my phone on the charger and walking away from a few hours. It is amazing how freeing that is. To not have to think about what you might be missing. To not have to worry about it.
Between this article and that fetlife post, I may do it more. I realize how much it is unnecessary. The stress, the constant connection, etc. – I think it’s time to do something crazy – like shut off the technology more. I guess the universe is trying to tell me that.