Giving is the only way you have a life.  Giving an ear to a friend when they need it.  Giving your heart to people you love.  Giving hugs. Giving kisses. Giving help.  Giving friendship.  Getting is interesting, but it is what we toss out in the universe that gives us life.

It’s funny because when I read this, I laughed.  I worked for a guy who, when asked the possibilities for options for solving a problem, he would start with “do nothing” and “stop doing what you are doing that is causing the issue”.  People used to think he was a smart ass, and he was – but his point was that the simple options are often overlooked.  Do nothing sometimes is the smartest solution.  Why? Fixing the issues cost too much – not just money but pain and all too.  And sometimes simply stop doing it is the best way to stop causing the problems.  Wanna be happy – stop doing the shit that makes you unhappy.  But don’t forget “do nothing” because sometimes the change makes things worse, not better.

image by Matthew Kavan Brooks

Living in the past is not a place to be.  Living in the future is not either. Be present in the here and now.  It is the only moment you can participate in fully – and change if necessary – and savor.  The memories are made now.  Be an active player in them.  Don’t worry about the what-ifs and the what-could-bes. Be here and now.

Isn’t it funny how this happens with people we love?  We know they can be all of these things – not constantly, but at times – yet we forgive them, still love them – and move on.  Because we know that saying these things aloud to the person will simply give them license to do the same to us when we have our moments.  Some people don’t understand why its hard for me to punt people from my life.  It’s because I hate it when a moment of emotion from me results in the same from someone else.  In the end, we don’t like being those things – regardless of how much we say we don’t regret our life – we do wish it could have gone differently with a different end for the person we were dealing with.  Forgiveness is powerful.  Understanding that person behind the words and actions is still good enough to love is critical.  Saying “it’s okay” isn’t a sign of weakness – but of strength.  Strength to see behind the hurt the person caused in that moment and realize they are still worthy of love.  Because we all step on the people we care about sometimes.  We do it without thinking.  We do it because the person we do it to will always love us regardless – even when we wonder why.  They love us because they want us to figure it out.  And they know – like a parent knows with their child – that sometimes to do it, they must do things that don’t make sense.  It’s how they learn and grow.

Happy Monday!