Emmy: What should I write a blog about? I’m at a loss. Give me a topic.
TL: Hmmm…
Emmy: It’s not easy – see. 😉
TL: Yeah….But nothing ever happens to me!
Emmy: Like I have a lot that happens to me? I’m just opinionated.
Emmy: And verbose.
A bit later….
Emmy: You disappoint me. I figured if ANYONE would give me a good topic, it would be you. 😉

TL: Father/son bonding
Emmy: Uhmm….that could be interesting since I’m neither a father nor a son….
TL: That’s why I’m not responding silly
Emmy: I gathered that. I’m just being snarky….which Garbanzo said means it’s a day of the week. Go back to your bonding.
TL: Thank you….I’ve been telling my son to get off his phone! Lol!

Ahh…irony.
Or at least how I inadvertently created some.

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A conversation between me and DJ after dinner:

DJ: Moe, what can I have for dessert?
Emmy: Your sister is taking a bath. You can have some Indigo tea.
DJ: Can I squeeze all the juice out of her, so I can have extra flavor?
Emmy: If she’ll let you.
DJ: Wouldn’t it be better if we chopped her into little pieces so I can get the most flavor out of her?
Emmy: If you think she’ll let you.
DJ: Bwahahahahahaha

Garbanzo looks at me shaking his head.
Emmy: What?

(Yeah, the kids have my weird and ‘not right’ sense of humor. Poor Garbanzo.)

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A text from earlier:

X: Look at you making friends on Twitter 😛
Emmy: I’m making friends with her so that next time you miss a deadline, I can give her ideas of how to punish you.
X: That’s just evil.
Emmy: I would never be THAT evil. I mean, I like you. 😉

(X got a glimpse of my more evil side the other night – evil in terms of what I would do to someone I didn’t like, thus the distinction.)

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An email between me and my boss’s boss:

Emmy: Are you okay with him adding people to your team?
Her: Sure. Why not! The more, the merrier!
Emmy: I like that attitude! No seriously, he’s adding people to everyone’s team without consulting them first. So if you want me to deal with him, I will.
Her: He isn’t causing you too many problems, is he?
Emmy: Nah, he just got talked to which means he is freaking out. I’m learning to manage his craziness when this happens. It’s all good. (I hope.)

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A conversation with the consultant after the meeting where everyone was late:

Emmy: Did we just spend 20 minutes trying to convince the accountants not to put detailed cell phone info into the general ledger because the managers sometimes need the info to  manage their employee’s cell usage & they want to run a report rather than hand them the huge cell phone detail file?
Consultant: Uhm, yeah.
Emmy: You’re an accountant. Is that fucked up or is that fucked up?
Consultant: It’s wrong on many levels.
Emmy: Okay, I just wanted to make sure that I wasn’t overreacting when I asked them why they were trying to solve a people management issue via accounting.
Consultant: No, I was happy you did because that is NOT something we can solve using accounting.
Emmy: Just making sure. I think I made them feel stupid.
The consultant simply laughed.

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A text I sent as I went by the place where they were holding a high school event – an event SG and SGW were attending because their son was in it.

Emmy: I’m waving hello to you as I ride by on the train. Hope it’s all going well!
SG: Hello to you too!

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A conversation between my boss and I where he is explaining how he’s planning on making the two systems talk to each other without using this middle software everyone hates.

Emmy: You know that in order for this piece of the software to work properly, it needs that middle software, right?
Boss (looking at the diagram we just drew): Damn, you’re right.
Emmy (with a smirk): I know I’m right.
Boss (laughing): I’m learning that about you.

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A text message from Garbanzo….

Garbanzo: One of the kids stole a container of acid from the science room.
Emmy: They know it isn’t the acid they can get high off of, right?

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And finally:
Garbanzo: I’m turning off the light and laying here with a semi-erect cock in case someone wants to come suck on it.

I think that’s my cue to schedule this and head to bed. 🙂
(And thank you TL! See – you did give me an idea!)

found on vi.sualize.us
Happy Friday!!