While watching TV one night while Garbanzo was away, DJ asked what they were talking about in that commercial. I had, in the past, blown her off with some stupid excuse, but decided it was time to just have that damn talk with her. So I did.
“Moe, you are SOOO weird!!” was the general response from her as we discussed it.
I decided recently that I was going to use her love of science when having this talk, so I suggested that she go grab a particular anatomy book she has. And, as luck would have it, this one had four pages dedicated to reproduction as well as puberty. Perfect. So, we talked about girls and boys and the changes to their bodies. We talked about the menstrual cycle and what that meant – complete with diagrams and pictures. Then we talked about the mechanics of how babies were made. She knew some of it, but didn’t know all of it.
“So, you mean, that when the dogs wrestle they are having sex??”
“Not really – they are pretending to as a way of showing dominance.”
“That’s soooo weird!”
“Yes, DJ, it is.”
“So, a man and a woman in a movie aren’t just wrestling, they are having sex?”
Then she grabbed her book and left in giggles.
A few days later, Garbanzo asked if I had had the talk with DJ. I confirmed I had and asked why.
“She asked me questions all the way home from school. WHAT did you tell her?”
I explained what we covered, and he shook his head as he left the room.
Hell, he teaches sex ed to the boys in 5th grade, he can handle this.
A few days after that, she came down after bedtime.
“Moe, I was thinking. Why is it that that chickens lay eggs, but the eggs never turn into chicks.”
Garbanzo gave me this look like he didn’t know if he should laugh at me or hate me for what I started.
“Well, remember when we went to the farm to get the produce? Remember when that rooster tackled that chicken? They were having sex.”
“Okay, that’s what I was wondering.” Then she went back to bed.
Sunday, she asked me how young you can be to get pregnant.
“Why? Are you planning to get pregnant?”
“It depends on when you start menstruating. Remember the egg thing?”
“Oh, so that explains why the youngest mom was like 8 or something. She started menstruating then had sex. That’s just too young.”
“Yes, it is.”
I guess if I am happiest about anything it is the fact she IS asking questions. I don’t think I would have been so bold to do it myself at that age, so I am happy about that. And she did ask how people could have sex without getting pregnant, so we did start the conversation about the fact there are some ways to protect against that. All of this at 9 years old seems a bit young in some respects, but is likely perfect timing in other respects. I guess that realistic approach has a lot to do with Garbanzo teaching middle school and hearing about what they talk about these days.
All of this is good assuming Garbanzo doesn’t kill me first.
I mean, he is looking at nunneries so that the whole sex thing can be avoided.
Guess he missed his opportunity.