Who You Gonna Call?


Forgive my theme for the next couple days of me bitching about my family.  But, I need to get a couple things off of my chest.

First up, my parents are moving.  They got the keys to their house last week and have been getting stuff moved into the place.  My parents are spending all of their spare time moving and cleaning and just trying to get into the new house & out of the rental.

Two weeks ago, my parents asked if I would take a couple days off of work this week to come down and help them.  Their hope was to get all of the adult children together to get this move done quickly.

I tried to get the time off, but came to realize that the right thing was not to take it off.  Project has hit a critical time, so taking the time off may create unneeded stress.  Also, my boss is counting on me to keep everyone on the right path while she is off dealing with another department.  I need the reference and her network of contacts to find a new job – so I’m trying to not burn that bridge.

I told my parents who totally understand and am sending Garbanzo and the kids down there from Monday afternoon to Wednesday sometime.  I talked to my mom Sunday night to tell her the news.  She’s relieved because…..I guess none of my brothers and/or sisters-in-law can help or have been helping.

As Garbanzo commented in his Sunday post, we are on the verge of moving just to demand back all of the help we’ve given both brothers.  We helped my brother B and his wife move into their first place after they moved here.  Garbanzo went down when they bought their house and helped them move too.  When N moved earlier this year, we made the trip down and helped him move out of that apartment with horrific stairs.  How nothing was broken or no one hurt is beyond me.

They have all been grateful for the help.  Don’t get me wrong, but I’m a bit baffled by their inability to help our parents move.  When my parents moved here, they had movers, so the excuse cannot be made that they have already helped them once.

Time wise, I can give my brother N a bit of a pass on this issue.  His work schedule is crazy as a chef, so much so that I barely see him whenever I’m in town.  I saw him for a grand total of 10 minutes when I was down there for 5 days in March.  I get that.  It’s the downside of his chosen career.

But B – B has the time.  B has had the time to help too.  While going and playing disc golf on top of Mt Bachelor is a pretty awesome way to spend an afternoon – so is helping your fucking parents.

So, my family is going to make the trek down to Bend to help.  They are going to spend 7 hours in the car.  They are going to spend at least $60 in gas alone.  They are going to help my parents move in 100+ degree heat.  And, knowing my husband, he will move most of it because he is who he is.  He won’t want my dad to get hurt, so he’ll risk injury himself instead.

I think what makes this more of a point of contention for me is the fact we are doing this because they are my parents.  They have never given Garbanzo or I babysitting services.  They have never dropped everything to come help with a crisis.  They have never given us money if asked.  Neither of my brothers can say these things.  Both of them have utilized the grandparents babysitting services a LOT.  Whenever my niece is having the slightest cough that is freaking my sister-in-law out, my parents drop everything to help her when she calls.  And money – they have both gotten what little my parents have had to offer in the past.

So now it’s my parents turn to call, and no one is answering… but us.
I have a problem with this one.

Update: So after writing all of this and scheduling it to post, I get an email from B.  He asked when we were coming down because maybe he’ll try to take some time off this week.  My response: Garbanzo and the girls are already there.  I don’t know what he’s going to do.  I can only hope he does the right thing.  I do know it was a little late in the day for him to actually ask for time off.  I guess I’ll hear later.

2 Comments Add yours

  1. Just me... says:

    I have to brag on my brother.. While he isn’t much on the manual labor aspect of assisting in these areas, he will hire people to help.. He won’t mow your grass, but he’ll have someone come do it and will pay for it too.. Ditto on moving. He called several times trying to get me to let him send movers to help.. Me being hardheaded and way too proud, I refused..
    My neck is bitching me out for that refusal as I type.. :):):)

  2. That is so sad that they can’t help but a big kuddos to your hubby and girls for going there to help them!

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