Ramblings of the Sick

I am blessed that I don’t have major issues with my kids and their behavior.  If you read the Facebook memes that people like to post, it must be because my kids were spanked. Uhm, they weren’t.  I just have always held onto the belief that I am the adult and am ultimately responsible for…

1am

I was asleep by 9pm.  I had been in bed for almost two hours by that point – feeling tired and achy and feverish – I finally just went to curl up there. But my body has now woken me up.  Feeling the same way again. I hate sick. I woke up this morning feeling…

Lightning

I woke up thirsty, so quietly got out of bed in hopes of not disturbing the dogs – and headed to the kitchen for water.  While I’m standing at the sink, I see the flashes of lightning go across the sky – not just the light but the actual bolt, branches reaching out for clouds…

Missing Sleep

Sleep has been elusive for me.  Ten days ago, I was pretty sure it was hormone related. (Spike in hormones before the start of a cycle always seems to make an insomniac out of me.) Once that passed, I figured it was because of the stress of getting the house packed and moved for the…

Go With The Flow

I got the good news about my mom yesterday afternoon, then upon seeing the weight of the stress fall away from my parents, left them to rest.  I went to seek my own recharge from my own stress.  Normally, a group full of kinky people will do it, so I headed to the munch. I…

“It’s Not Who You Are….”

“You don’t deal with uncertainty. You want to know exactly where you stand with people – what is happening and that it’s all good. You don’t do limbo well. You can’t be patient because unclear and uncertain and unknown is not a place you thrive. It’s a place you panic. I get it – I…

Haunted and Other Ramblings

I hate dreams that haunt you. Dreams that stick with you even after you wake up – you relive them when the brain is idle – that dream creeps into your consciousness from your subconscious like a cat walking into a room – quiet and unexpectedly. I dreamed of him the other morning. I dreamed…

Poly on a Pedestal

“You come up in all of our poly discussions.” It’s funny how one can inadvertently become an example of something. In my case, it’s poly.  G and I have considered ourselves poly for several years now – and because we have successfully navigated it – we have become an example of success we did not…

Bouncing Around

I feel like I should write, but I don’t know what I should say. Lots of words bouncing around my head and in my heart. Just don’t know if they should come out. Yesterday was a weird day in so many ways. A rollercoaster of my life, I swear. Fuck, who am I kidding, it’s…

Wednesday Wanderings

I did something yesterday I never, ever thought I would do. I listed “political unrest” as a risk to a project’s go-live.  When you are going live in countries where an election can create several weeks of political unrest, thereby disrupting business and the economy, well, it is indeed a risk.  I do applaud the…