This week, Erika Moen put forth a comic on Oh Joy Sex Toy about her thoughts on 50 Shades of Grey. And honestly, it gave me pause. I have written about my thoughts on this book with the bend being why it isn’t a good representation of a healthy BDSM D/s relationship. And I truly…
Tag: advice
Open Relationship Advice to a Reader
I received a comment/question the other day from a reader. It was on an older post, and I could not find his email address, so I figured I would address it here. His comment goes like this: “I’m navigating an open marriage. My wife has been pleased with her prospects, for me, every time I…
The Power of Vulnerability
This video is from almost 3 years ago. Funny how I only found it now. Ironically I follow this woman on Twitter yet I found her through another connection. I wish I had found it years ago. Her words are true. This past week, I have realized how true they are. How much I have…
Open vs Poly
SB has had an interesting introduction to poly. Or rather, an interesting introduction of how poly can be confused with open as though they are the same thing. While they can be the same, for example, G and I are open but poly too. When we were swinging, however, we were only open. Poly was…
Never Pinch a Sadist: Demons & BDSM
This is a tricky subject. This is a controversial subject. I can only hope I get my point across. Recently, someone in our local community posted a rant/reminder about touching. Consensual touching is a big deal in the kink scene. The number one thing I tell all swingers who are at a kink party is…
Never Pinch A Sadist: The Label Dilemma
I know I can – with the right person – be polyamorous. So I may identify as a poly person – but it does not mean all of my relationship are poly. I am more poly-capable than poly-all-the-time. Poly means many. Amorous means love. Many loves is, at the root, what that word means. And while…
Never Pinch a Sadist: 50 Shades of Plaid
I am trying to read 50 Shades of Grey. When it first was out, G got me an electronic copy of it. I was in the middle of other books, so it sat undownloaded to my Kindle app. And then it gained popularity to a point where I could not ignore it. So I downloaded…
A Bad Word
Last night, I had a conversation with a friend that went like this: Her: “….and then she made it clear, I don’t want a relationship with you. I just want to be playmates.” Me: “She does know that playmates are a defined relationship right?” Her: “I know….but geesh, did she think I wanted to keep…
Never Pinch a Sadist #3: Relationship Rules
Just this past week, I have had a two different conversations with people about being in an open relationship and being in poly relationships – and each time, I have added at the end, that my husband and I have no rules. Before I continue, I will ask the question you may be asking yourself,…
How to Fuck-Up an Open Relationship without Really Trying
I’m watching a lot of self-destruction happening lately in relationship that are open relationships. So I figured why not make a list of what I’m seeing. If you recognize yourself in this list and you are “open”, you may want to reconsider. 1. Lie. Simple enough. Don’t be honest about what you are doing. Omit…