Epiphany

My tantra teacher used to remark during her conversations that the universe will give you what you need.  It will never give you more than you can deal with, and it may dole out the lessons you need too.  But sometimes what feels like a setback is actually the universe teeing something up for you….

The Evasive Sleep

Sleep has evaded me this weekend.  No matter how tired I feel – how much my body is saying, “sleep will make you feel better” – my mind, I’m guessing, is keeping me awake.  I end up sleeping in fits and starts, then find myself awake for several hour stretches in the middle of the…

An Interesting Turn of Events

He had mentioned that a friend’s mom had dragged him to thrift shops, and he found he enjoyed it.  Did we know of any, he asked.  At the time, we mentioned we knew of a few places.  Could he come along next time? Sure, we promised. Then that was that.Fast forward to last Saturday. I…

Cows, Meditation and Self-Care

I think this summarizes well my mental process today – trying to be meditative about this transition.  Breathing – reminding myself to breathe – and at the same reminding myself to let myself feel shit – even if it isn’t shit I want to feel.  My dad called me about noon today to see how…

Self Care Is Hard

“Love, take care of yourself.” I have heard this a number of times from a few people the last few days.  And today, I took it to heart. I went home. Since Thursday at 5:30am, I have been focused on getting to my dad, being with my dad, helping my mom, and helping my dad. …

Text Messages and Worry

I had slept like crap last night. After a crazy full weekend,  Sunday night I had received a text message that we all dread on some level: “FYI: Dad’s in the hospital – Mom has the info. Thought you should know.” Fuck.  And – at least they let me know. Calls to all of the…

Adulthood

When I was a child, I remember feeling like time just dragged on.  The school year felt like it lasted more than a year.  The year I had to wait to get my driver’s license seemed to never end.  And that wait until graduation seemed to take forever.  The watched pot never boils, I guess,…

Holidays

The last few days have been crazy. Friday, we loaded up the car and drove to my parents’ house. Saturday, we had the family Christmas – 14 people in the house – 6 kids.  It was a day of eating great food.  It was filled with nerf gun fights and games.  It was filled with…

22

Yesterday marked 22 years of marriage for G and me. We spent the early afternoon watching the Portland Thorn Women’s Soccer team play some great soccer against the Orlando team, earning them a place in the championship game.  Seeing Alex Morgan shut down and pretty much on the ground was a highlight.  (She played for…

6500 Miles

6500 miles. 11 hours ahead of me. On the shores of the Caspian Sea. And I get a call, “WTF should I do??” Oh, FUCK me! His dilemma, 11 hours ahead of me, was to risk the ferry voyage without a pre-issued visa or not.  People have done it both ways – with and without…