Captive’s Log – The Release

(I thought I had published this two days ago…..but discovered this morning that I had not. Screw it – I’ll publish it in case there is someone curious how my time in captivity ended……even if it is two days late!)

I rolled over and thought, “wow, this is good sleep”, then opened my eyes and looked at the clock.

7:30am

Fuck.

I needed to be down at the conference at 7:30am.

My alarm was set to 6:30am.

Did I exclaim “fuck” already?

Fuck.

I dug through my bag and found whatever clothes I could throw on my body. I brushed my hair, found a pony tail holder, and put it up in a bun. Then I had to pack my stuff, check the room, then head down to the conference that I was almost late for.

Only then did I get some coffee.

Fuck.

I had caught my reflection in a decorative mirror, and my eyes were red like I had been smoking something or at least been in a smoky room. I was barely awake wondering when I was going to feel almost sick between the fast acceleration and the lack of coffee. It was after my first cup and about 10 minutes into the meeting. In case you are keeping track at home.

The session today was an IQ test. Who was going to remember that our focus was X and only X – not all of the other letters. How were they going to put it together? Could they put it together?

There were a lot of people not doing well on that test.

The facilitator, the the owner of the company later, commented that not everyone is going to make the turn to the new way because, well, sometimes the old way was more attractive to them. They didn’t want to get rid of their kingdoms or at least be removed – so they would go find their own kingdoms…..at another company. This made people nervous but followed what I was seeing – that some were not getting it. We have to do more than just point to the problem and say it needs to go away……we need to be part of making it go away.

After a lot of debate and all, we wrapped up with good stuff and left.

And it was good stuff.

I would love to say that this was bullshit but all of the work we did – the agreement we found – was going to make it hard for people to toss it away. I understood why there were long hours and lots of tired discussions. We needed it. We needed the commitment. We needed it all. It was like a group therapy session where we all got out our issues and came up with a plan to heal.

I feel like we could heal.

The question is will we.

I came home tonight feeling good about things – feeling good about the time I spent.

What do you think?

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