My boss was my cohort at my last job.  I’ve known him for 2, maybe 3 years at most.  One of the first times I was in a meeting to support a change he was driving at the last company, someone who opposed the change finally threw out what they really thought.  That he was an outsider who did not know the first thing about what they were going through, so pretty much, fuck off.

While everyone else saw a guy who was contemplating his next comment, I saw a guy who was deciding if the jail time was worth the crime he was about to commit.  In that situation, I jumped in because they couldn’t say the same thing to me – I was living it.  I made the point – I made it VERY clearly.  And prevented the crime from being committed.

Today, I saw him on the verge of losing it.  Fuck, all of us in the room were on the verge of losing it.  But he went from sitting back, counting to 10 ten, to resting his head on the table to looking at the person he replaces as IT leader and mouthing “please say something”.

At one point during this meeting, I was looking at the people in the room mouthing “we’ve had this fucking conversation 5 times in the past 2 months – WTF?!?”

WTF indeed.

Because I’m new and my boss is new – we are in the middle of a huge political play for power.  It is bigger than all of us.  The company is changing.  For those who have fought to find their place are having to do it again.  While that is normal behavior in some ways, the degree of stupid is big.  Holy hell.

This craziness resulted in me, the architect whose world is in turmoil, and the boss staying until 6pm getting ready for his next round with his peers on Monday morning – at 7am.

I came home, changed, and took the kid and her girlfriend out for dinner.  G and the other kid are at a school thing until late.  Fuck cooking.  Plus we went to a place with beer.  Score!

This weekend is kind of crazy. Tomorrow the oldest has an art thing she has to do at school. There is an early Thorn’s game.  Then I have extra teens in the house for an overnight.  And pizza for a fundraiser.  Oh, and I have a book to finish for the class in two weeks.  And a book discussion to prepare for.  And an art show to hang.  And and and…..yeah.

I miss my Saturday nights.  What can I say – I do miss a night where I get to just be me.  I get to relax, be an adult instead of a “Mom”, and be with someone I love and care about and who feels the same. I miss scotch while curled up on the couch.  I miss watching a show that kids wouldn’t appreciate but fuck that, they were not around.  I recently finished a show that started there – Deadwood – and wished I had someone to talk to about it – someone who would have enjoyed it as much as much me. I miss the conversations.  But over it all – I miss the person who provided it all.

…….