“Have you notice that I don’t say his name,” I commented to G.

He nodded.  “I know you don’t – I know why you don’t – but say his name.”

At this point, we were talking about DJ.  G had said something, and the only thing that crossed my mind, is what he has said so many times:

“She can be anything she wants – she just doesn’t know it.”

I said it but he could tell it was more than just my words.

“He would say that,” I commented.

“He?”

“Don’t make me say it,” the tears were already in my eyes.

“It’s OK – say it – I don’t care.”

So I said it – I said his name.  I took deep breaths because it was hitting me more than I had expected.

“It’s ok,” he said, ” say it – it’s ok.”

Fuck.

Months have passed, yet there I still am.

Fuck.

“It’s okay – say it.”