Winding Down


It’s 12:15 pm.

And my work for the day is done.

Oh, let me be honest, my work has been done since 10:30 am.

I have nothing on my to-do list.

I have no unread or un-replied to emails.

All project plans are up-to-date.

My budget trackers are up-to-date.

I am truly out of work today.

What is even more interesting about this is the fact that this is my first day back in the office after being sick a week.  But even sick, I kept up on all of my work.  Nothing was late or fell through the cracks.  All emails were answered – all issues were dealt with.  Status reports were even on-time.

Our company was acquired 6 weeks ago.  The company who bought us has been making decisions here and there in terms of who to keep and who to lay off.  It became clear a couple of weeks ago that my team is on the chopping block.  I think the decision is a combination of things.  First, my boss has been looking to other executives to save us without paying attention to the organization of the acquiring company.  His own internal politics backfired as all of the executives to which he hitched his wagon have all gone on to save themselves, but not their teams.  Instead, the boss should have gone to counterpart at the acquiring company and started talking to him directly about how we merge our resources.  Ah, nothing like some project management hubris to keep one from meeting someone as an equal.  He truly thinks we are better than they are.  I have told him point blank a few times that their team does some great things – embrace them & relish doing things right.  But nope.

I’m okay with the idea we are likely getting laid off.  This company has been so beyond dysfunctional since I have walked in the door that I am really surprised they have existed as long as they have.  Even towards the end when people were wanting the company to fight the acquisition, some of us had to point out that the company has no cash.  We are out of money.  We don’t get acquired; we go out of business.  This is where we are at, yet ego was keeping things afloat. It’s the same ego that has lead to a series of questionable decisions the last 5 years.  Today I spoke to a cohort who was telling me stories that had my jaw on the floor.  And all of it is based in ego and incompetence.

I told my boss yesterday that I have nothing to do.  His response was “sucks, doesn’t it?”   Then I remembered he doesn’t know how to manage people.  Another member of my team commented to me that she was happy to work exclusively from home because at least she isn’t trapped in the office trying to pretend to work.  She can get other things done.  I’m jealous.  I don’t know how I’m going to get through the week if this is my workload.  And its going to get worse as my project wraps up on the 15th.

I’ll do my best to not go stir crazy until they finally lay us off.  Until then, I am being paid a lot of money to do nothing.  A lot of money pretending to work.  On one hand, I’ll take it.  On the other…..

oh help me keep my sanity!

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