Today, a kinky friend of mine posted his response to an article he recently read. I read his response, in which, he doesn’t initially say the name of the article itself. But that didn’t matter – I knew exactly which article it was and who wrote it before he even revealed it.
And chuckled because it’s been around for a couple of years now – and it seems every so often, another person I know sees it and rants about how everyone should read it. It’s a good article, don’t get me wrong. The cycle of who finds it when always supports my theory that sometimes you see something – a book, a poem, an article….. hell, even a piece of art — and at that moment of initial discovery, you are not ready for it. So, you start reading, think “this is dumb” and toss it aside. Later – sometimes years later, you come across it again, read it, and think it is the most amazing thing ever – and wonder aloud why you haven’t discovered it earlier. Then you are compelled to tell everyone you know about this thing because it’s so amazing. Truth is, you did discover it earlier – likely from a friend who told everyone they knew how amazing it was – you just weren’t ready for it at that time.
I have often used this phrase – a phrase I have openly stolen from a friend of mine who used it in an email to me once after I thanked him for something he wrote & that I needed to hear.
“I’m glad the words found you.”
I like that idea of words or even ideas finding you when you need them. Sometimes we spend so much time and effort seeking out something that explains how we are feeling or helps us cope with something or inspires us. And no matter where we look – we cannot find them. Nothing resonates with us – nothing triggers what we know intellectually we need to do but cannot mentally or emotionally bring ourselves to do it.
Then, like happened with my kinky friend……the words find you. The words sit in your mind and make sense and shape your go-forward approach to something. The words speak to you – they trigger something in you.
It is ironic that I was going to sit down today and write a whole post about “here are the articles this guy has written that everyone should read”. That was going to be my response to the fact my kinky friend found this article that’s been around for so long. A response of “here my blog readers, don’t be like this guy and find these great words so late.”
Then I went to Mark Manson’s website, noticed he had written something a couple of weeks ago…something I missed. I read the article…..and realized “fuck – I needed to read that…..like right now, I needed to read it.”
And my perspective of my kinky friend’s reaction to another one of Mark Manson’s articles changed.
It wasn’t he was missing out – he just needed those words today.
Just like I did.
And it knocked my snarky response right off the page.
For my kinky friend, I know why Mark Manson’s article called “Fuck Yes or No” — it’s a relationship article that gives perfect advice……in short, if you are lukewarm about a person or have to convince a person, it’s a ‘fuck no’ on one or both sides, so move on. Knowing this kinky friend and all he’s been through – this is good advice….more than good but perfect advice….for anyone.
For me, Mark Manson’s article called “Shut Up and Be Patient” struck a chord. It’s about remembering that our lives are big ships — quick turns are not something we can do instantly….. most of the time we have to shut up and be patient. I know this intellectually, but sometimes…..ok, most of the time…..my lack of patience gets the better of me – and I want it now dammit – why can’t it just happen already if its going to happen? I mean, obviously it means it won’t happen so why the fuck am I trying?!? Yeah – that can be my thought process…..it’s funny how I can give the patience advice to others – just don’t practice it myself. Shrug. I know that about me – just ignore that characteristic of myself and instead chastise myself internally for not being able to pull off that quick turn in life that I’m trying to make.
Another one I know I’ve posted a link to before – but another Mark Manson great — “The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck“. I was drawn to it because the word “fuck” was in the title – but stayed because it was well written and perfect in so many ways.
And finally – I will leave you with Mark Manson’s “Stop Trying To Be Happy“. I try to remember this article when I am picking Motivational Monday items because, well, everyone seems to have some clever saying that, if followed, will make you happy. He debunks many of the themes of those “get happy quick” approaches.
So, you see what I did there? I said I was not going to write a post about articles of Mark Manson’s everyone should read if you haven’t already – but then I did. Clever, huh?
Truthfully, I did because I do hope you find the words you need right now. Something that jump starts you in a way you have been needing – or brings you peace in a way you need – or just makes you laugh because that’s what you need right now.
Words are powerful things.
May the right ones find you.