When The Unthinkable Happens

When I saw the first Tweet,  I had to find out what was going on.  Tragedy had struck, and I was hoping the first tweet was the setup and there would be a happy ending. But sadly there was not..

I have been reading Jade (aka PiecesofJade) for many years.  I marveled at her explorations of her kink, but what struck me most was how great of a picture she painted of her polyamorous relationship with the two men in her life.  While incredibly honest in her emotions, she demonstrated how people can make a poly relationship work – and work well.  Too many times, it seems the poly story ends poorly – but I liked reading her story because it was a demonstration of how that doesn’t have to be the case.

Until those tweets.

Long story short – one of the men in her life fell ill – his family decided to take that opportunity to express their objections about his poly relationship through their actions: by blocking her from him.  No visits. No updates. No idea where he is at or how he is doing.  One day she was by his side; the next: poof.

Reading it, I could feel her devastation – and I immediately put myself in her shoes.  How would I feel if I knew one of the men in my life was very ill only to have all my access to him and information about him blocked?  Just the idea upset me.

They tell you to have conversations with your loved ones about end of life decisions and such.  They talk about writing it into your wills, etc.  It never crossed my mind that I should set expectations with SB and G about what I did not want to have happen if something happened to me or one of them.  I guess I had expected that an illness or accident would result in a “all-hands-on-deck” sort of approach with friends and family circling the wagons to do whatever to support the person effected.  It never crossed my mind the family may take that chance to sever relationships they found unacceptable, on my behalf.

So, I have had the conversations with both of them.  Seemed like a silly conversation but upon hearing the story, they both immediately understood why I was having it.  I’m grateful I have two men in my life who understand so readily.

Attorneys involved now in the situation with Jade – to get access to him and information about him – and to fight for their home.  A fundraising effort is underway for helping her with legal fees and all. So far, the initial goal has been made, but like all legal battles, more funds will be needed.

If you have a couple dollars to spare, please consider supporting her efforts.

I can only hope that she wins her fight against their cruelty. Because no matter what his family may think about poly and all, they are hurting him more than anyone by not allowing him to have access to all the people that love and care about him.  To not allow him to have the full support one would need with what he is going through – support that could only help him.  That is just incredibly selfish on the part of his family.

But truly, I hope he is okay.  And ultimately, I hope he gets to a point where he can communicate (strongly) his feelings of anger towards what his family has done.

But realistically, I hope she gets to be with him again – especially if the situation is as grave as the rumors she has her indicate they are.

All I know is my thoughts and positive energy is with them all.

3 Comments Add yours

  1. hubman38 says:

    I can’t imagine the pain and frustration that Jade is going through lately.

    I think there’s a lesson here for anyone living in a relationship outside that which is normally provided legal recognition and some element of protection- even if you don’t think you’d need it, power of attorney and a living will can be critically important documents at unexpected times.

What do you think?