Stupid Should Hurt…

….and not the person forced to listen to stupid.

I’m having a day where I’m attracting the stupid.  And it’s making my head hurt – it’s destroying my mood. My snark is in overdrive today. And my internal dialog consists of “just don’t respond, just don’t respond, just don’t respond”.

So far, I’m holding it back….but fuck is it hard.

A friend is going through a rough time right now. Dying family member – unexpected illness and diagnosis.  I get it. Screws with a person.  But when exchanges like this happen:

Friend: I would take my cat, but she’d run all over the car freaked out.
Me: Get a pet carrier.
Friend: Oh, she’d just get out.
Me: Only if she spent 10hrs trying to chew her way out or grow thumbs
Friend: Hello? She’s a cat!

What I did not reply with:
“So cats can grow thumbs – had no idea! Wonder if biologists have discovered this!”
or
“Hello! You’re a human – bigger and smarter – I think you can figure out how to close the carrier or are you saying she is smarter than you?”

I’m not a nice person – or am I for shutting up?

I’m trying to resolve a situation that has erupted between two “Dominant” men ….of fuck, I’ll even put “men” in quotes given how these fuckers are acting.

Short story – The art gallery I run noticed several photos missing from the bathroom.  Weeks later, a photo was posted on Fetlife – in the background of the photo posted was one of the missing bathroom photos.  Messages were exchanged between the guy on my team and the guy with the photo.  This was said – that was said – photo was promised to be returned – but never was because of schedules, or whatever.  Fast forward a month: something is posted about it on Fetlife – accusations fly – the guy with the photo is upset so refuses to give it back without a public apology.

*head desk*

So…..I have to enter the ring now.

Why? Because now that this is public like it is, I know it is going to get back to the owner. And I know the owner of the gallery is going to be pissed. He is not someone you fuck with because even if he is wrong, he will have taken action to ban you forever simply because he doesn’t trust you.  All I need is that phone call from him.

I find out who has it – basically tell him I don’t care what is happening, he’s gonna be in deep shit if he has it and the owner finds out – so I tell him to return it to me.  Arrangements are made – all is good – I communicate back to the guy who was trying to rectify the situation and say “I’ve got this handled”.

“Oh, my girlfriend is going to report it stolen to the owner of the gallery if you don’t get it by Thursday.” — Guy to me

Outward response: “It won’t be an issue. I’ve got it handled.”
Inside voice: “Oh, you guys spend a month building up this drama, take it public, and you’re giving me two days  to clean it up before you all take it to the gallery owner. Thanks for now dragging me even deeper into your epic fucked up drama!”

Today, I’m told by the guy that he’s sure I’m not getting it back from the guy who has it because he’s a weasel in trying to get out of meeting.  “He wouldn’t even tell me why he couldn’t meet me when he canceled.”

Snarky Emmy: “True – he does owe you a written explanation for what is happening in his life because you have such a good connection with him to this point.”

*head desk* *head desk* *head desk*

As for the guy accused of stealing art from the bathroom, he has been decent in some respects but…his own brand of special.

I have resisted addressing his statements that are just this side of “but he hurt my feelings” or my favorite: “I’ll return it to you but I expect a receipt from you saying that the photo was turned over to you and is now in your possession and I no longer have it.”

I did respond to that last one with:

“How about this? When the gallery owner calls me which he will given the bullshit going on, how about I tell him, that there is no longer an issue because I have the photo?”

I did not respond to it with:
“Shall I bring along a witness and notary too so you feel like that the piece of paper is legit?”

Are you fucking kidding me?!

Then we have the stupid at work…..

……”just keep your mouth shut, just keep your mouth shut…..”

The leader for stupid today at work is simple:

A country did not go live twice – was delayed three months – because of a rounding issue.  The system isn’t doing it the way the country wants it to occur on the invoice to the customer.

I just found out today that the country is using an in-country government invoicing system that generates the invoice to the customer.  Our system will not be doing it for in-country customers.

Oh, yeah – and they manually key in the invoice into that system meaning – THEY COULD ROUND IT WHEN THEY ENTER IT”…….no system solution needed.

Where’s my ibuprofen…..?

What do you think?