Despite my best efforts.

In times of crazy, I fail.

I fail to keep everyone around me whole – and that kills me.

It eats at me.

And I hate it because I hate letting down those I love.

I’ve been struggling with this all week.  A month in the making when the fact I can’t keep it all together came crashing down making it worse.

I wish I had a time-turner (for Harry Potter fans)  – so I can fit more into a day.  I wish I could just say fuck society and structure life like I want it.  I wish I could get paid to do what I get done vs punching a clock and playing fucking games at work.

But reality and want are different things.

I wish they were not.

Sigh.

I don’t want to hurt anyone I love. Inadvertently or not.

But sadly, my cape is not around – and I cannot always be wonder woman. No matter how hard I try.