How to Deal with Grumpy at Work

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Between fighting with the dog for covers and immediately hitting stupid at work, I decided it was best to avoid people – because I was definitely grumpy.  So how am I dealing with them?

  1. Imagine killing a signature gatherer who bothered me 3 times while waiting for my food.  Coffee cup to the head – plastic fork to the genitals – death by a thousand papercuts using the papers he is demanding I sign. Some of the options are entertaining at least.
  2. Munch on almonds while giggling at the fact the bag actually has the phrase “salty nuts” on it.  Yeah, I’m 12.
  3. Text with Daddy – he always makes me smile.
  4. Make snarky comments to a cohort who makes them back – and is usually feeling the same way.
  5. Watch Buffy on Netflix on my iPhone while doing boring project plan updates.  Mmmm….Buffy & Spike rough sex.
  6. Make G promise that after the school carnival I will have to attend from start-to-finish that he will take me to my favorite pub for beer and really good burgers because I’ll deserve it by then.
  7. Think through various scenarios that would be funny if one of the moms from my exercise group decided to include me in her game of “see if I can shock the other moms”.  Depending on the angle I take, I could definitely win that game.   I could go simple – and toss out that I curate the erotic art at a sex club – or I could go all out and say that the best part of last weekend was screwing around with my boyfriend after he beat me.  Yeah -the thought IS entertaining.
  8. Enjoying the moment when a point I have been trying to make to my boss lands – and it becomes clear from his reaction that I’m more qualified than he is for his job.  If you are going to fake it, you must be good at it.  Because if you aren’t, it’s just entertaining.
  9. Post something on FB that has a different message depending on who you are in my life.  Then giggle at who comments or “likes” it.
  10. Set a countdown to when you are going to leave work for the weekend.  Can’t be grumpy when you see it getting closer and closer.

What do you think?