Sitting there on the couch, in the dark, sipping a beer with our hands on each other, my head on his shoulder as I was curled into the crook that I seem to fit into, we watch Sherlock of all things. I was so grateful to have him over. A great weekend with him where I went home to the crazy of the kids and work and the schedule of things as I’m picking up the slack with G out of town. I knew I would crash hard alone in the crazy.
“Think about coming for dinner tonight” was my parting text with him after our morning “good mornings” yesterday. I wanted to see him – I needed a touchstone in the crazy. I was happy he accepted.
He came into the house as I was dealing with a very frustrated teenager with a multi-step algebra equation. I was on my third round of trying to break it down for her. And she was giving me the “sorta” response to my inquiry of “does this make sense?” And no she didn’t get it but wasn’t able to tell me what she didn’t get – explain it again.
SB’s timing was perfect. And not just because he brought beer.
I could feel him even without touching him – feel his love, his energy and the balance he brings to me. I got her to a decent place – then we all talked while standing at the island at the kitchen as I got the rest of the food cooked.
We wandered outside for a moment – enjoying the warm spring weather and sun we had been blessed with – arm in arm – kissing sweetly under the blooming laurel bushes as my pit-bull-in-a-china-shop tried to disrupt. The tension and the stress went away.
After dinner, we found ourselves in the living room watching Family Guy with Indigo – laughing at the stupidity – and the fact we all kinda have an odd sense of humor. Then I sent her to go read before bed – and we both relaxed now that the kid-deeds were done.
And there we found ourselves on the couch, watching a program. So very normal – so very wonderful. I love how he fits into my life – my crazy, Mom-focused life. I love that he finds my kids funny and weird and good. Could make someone want to run away but I appreciate how he embraced it.
As we ate strawberries straight from the sink where they were washed, the moonlight coming in through the window – it was hard knowing he had to go. It was hard for me knowing it would end for the night. But, this it was for the best especially knowing my crazy schedule would start again too early.
He went back home – and I layed in bed, feeling him with me – feeling his love and energy.
And knowing quite acutely that I am a lucky girl.