I’m tired of the political bullshit at work.
I’m tired of my boss deciding to engage only to cause issue.
I’m tired of worrying about my mom.
I’m tired of worry about my dad who refuses to take care of himself because he’s worried about my mom.
I’m tired of chasing the dog around as she chews on anything she can get her mouth on.
I’m tired of the other one protecting us from nothing.
I’m tired of hearing about the woes of others – woes that do not compare to the woes I am dealing with.
I’m tired of worrying about others.
I’m just tired.
Deep down in my bones, deep down in my soul, I’m tired.
And when I get like this, I want to run away. I want to tell the whole fucking work to simply do that – fuck off. I want to go hide. I want to just be alone – be me – be pissed at this unfair world.
….just want to be what I need to be.
And that is sad, frustrated, angry, unhappy….
I want to be outraged, I want to be pissed, I want to rip people’s heads off. I want to just get back at the feelings I am having. I want.
But I don’t.
I go home. I have a beer. I talk about my day with frustration -sometimes tears in my eyes. And I just try to let go.
Which isn’t alway easy.
Tonight – not so easy.