Conversation:
Peer: But they are out of the office Friday. You have to cancel the meeting.
Me: They asked me to add you to this meeting 5 min ago, so I guess we are having it.
Peer: But they are out.
Me: Okay.
Peer: You need to cancel it.
Me: Nope.
Peer: They are out though.
Me: Okay.
Peer: So cancel it.
Me: Nope.
Peer: They are out.
Me: Okay.
For the record, “they” are both dialing into the meeting and working from home. And this peer is a nitwit.
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Text Exchange:
Me: Can I just spend the rest of the work day curled up at your feet sucking your cock?
Him: I’m game.
Me: Work wouldn’t mind?
Him: Who cares?!?
Me: True, Mr Short-Timer.
Him: I could use a nice long suck about now.
Me: How about a nice slow wet lick?
Him: Delightful! Get your ass over here, you slut.
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Email exchange:
To: IT Consultant
From: Me
Subject: Tax for Country
Do we have the issue with the tax resolved now? I haven’t seen an update to the matter.
To: Me
From: IT Consultant
Subject: Re: Tax for Country
Yes. It is resolved.
To: IT Consultant
From: Me
Subject: Re: Tax for Country
Cool. Did you provide the info to the developer to get it coded?
To: Me
From: IT Consultant
Subject: Re: Tax for Country
No, not yet. Here is the status I provide to the Sr VP of IT on the country stuff.
To: My Boss
From: Me
Subject: FW: Tax for Country
Does this mean the IT consultant now works for me?
To: Me
From: My Boss
Subject Re: FW: Tax for Country
Good lord! He is doing what?!? I’ll see what I can do – but he may be working for you soon. That threat may be enough to make him back off. 🙂
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Conversation:
Me: How was the ride to the house?
Bro: Full of Jesus.
Me: Music or testimonial?
Bro: Both. Dad was in rare form.
Me: But, Bro – Jesus loves you.
Bro: Great! Can he also mow my lawn?
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Parenting moment:
Indigo: But I like driving Miss O crazy.
Me: Stop it or she’s going to kill you.
Indigo:
Me: Here’s a question – who is scarier if you don’t stop: Miss O or me?
Indigo: You.
Me: Then stop it or else I will be the one you have to deal with.
Indigo:
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You can skip the mosquito comment if it’s part of a kinky scene – just smile then 🙂
A rare form of stupidity in excess today…