I am trying not to be “STI information woman”, but given recent events, I feel like spreading information about it will help debunk the stigmas associated with them. Or at least, that is my hope.
Recently Nina Hartley answered a question a reader sent to her about “how to avoid STIs or STDs”. He was looking for secrets for staying “clean”. (I hate being negative being referred to as being ‘clean’, by the way.)
Check out her video answering him.
Go watch it. I’ll be here when you return.
I like her response because it really looks at sex in similar terms as you would look at anything you do. Want to avoid a car accident, don’t ride in a car….ever. Great way of approaching the topic in a similar way you do anything else in your life.
Also, despite our hope for otherwise, she points out that this risk comes with our choice of lifestyle. She is dead on. I was even guilty of not realizing that fully. Maybe it was because I was raised during the AIDS epidemic where the promise was no HIV if you used a condom. The mighty condom became the protector against everything – an implied guarantee, of sorts. Use it, and you will remain disease free – guaranteed.
So going into swinging, we (like many) believed a condom and a talk beforehand about being “STD free” was enough. But, clearly, that is far from the case as we now know. There are no guarantees – and a condom is important but not the be-all-end-all to STI protection.
Anyway, I can go on, but instead, go check out the video.
Listen to what she has to say.
And consider adjusting your thinking accordingly.
And if she doesn’t work, go read and listen to some Dan Savage who will pretty much tell you the same thing. Do a search on Herpes for some true perspective on that STI as well as his rant about them in general. My friend pointed me to him recently after I told her about our situation. I’m happy she did.