I was recently talking to a friend who commented I was on his short list for those he would help bury a body. I laughed because he was the second or third person who had told me that – a nice feeling that I have friends who would do such a deed. It did make me think however what a difference a year makes.
Twelve to eighteen months ago on this blog, you would have read how it has been too long since I had true friends – not just acquaintances. I knew a lot of people – but never felt as though I had someone who would help me in a time of true need – like having a body to bury. Today, I don’t feel that way at all. I have friends who I feel are true friends – people who don’t just take – but also give. People who when they hear “I’m fine” will actually call bullshit on me when they know I’m just giving an answer. Friends who seem to know what I need to hear before I even realize it.
I truly feel blessed with those in my life. I don’t have any vampires – people who just suck the life out of you and leave you dry (and not in the good way). They have all gone away. No people are left who I have to have my guard up. I don’t have to wonder when they will screw me over and showed me what our friendship really meant to them. In their place, I have people that truly care. No one is keeping score. No things is out of balance. No one has a hidden agenda. It is such a refreshing change.
The great irony is where I seemed to find these new friends. Most of the people are those we have met since we opened up our marriage – a wonderful side effect of the whole decision. Maybe it has happened because I don’t have anything I feel I need to hide from these people. They see me – all of me – for who I am – and they like me. They don’t just see the part they can see or want to see – or I want them to see. I can be who I am, and people enjoy it. Some of them even read my blog – another thing I haven’t needed to hide or worry about.
I’m glad my friend made that comment to me the other day. While I have felt incredibly blessed to have these people in my life as friends, it took that statement for me to realize how far I have come. To see how much things have changed for me – to see how much having people around me like this who have changed me.
As we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. -Marianne Williamson