It’s amazing what an overnight playdate will do for the mind…..and the body….but the mind too.
A miscommunication almost made it a quick night, but thankfully a change in his schedule led SG to call me Friday telling me of his changed.
“You’re spending the night, right?”
A quick text to G, and yes I was. I think he was as giddy as I was.
All day Friday, I kept having glimpses of things I was hoping we would do – or more specifically he would do to me. The drive down was longer than I had hoped. Rush hour on a Friday trying to get out of the city was just bad timing on my part. I could tell he was excited because I talked to him twice while I was in route.
And when I got there, he had everything ready in terms of me putting my car in his garage (nosy neighbors) – and as he locked the door to it, he turned to me and reminded me I now had no escape. He has me locked in for the night.
Yes, yes he did.
I’ll be honest. I was a bit worried if I was going to be mentally in the game. A lot of what G and I deal with these days is the mental hurdle we both have – that worry about infect. Sex has yet to resume “normal”. But, between SG and me, it was normal. It wasn’t hanging over our head. It was just play – hard – long – play. And I didn’t realized until we were laying there after round one how much “normal” I needed. How much of an escape from everything I needed. It was like my body and my mind exhaled – finally.
Later, TL made the same comment to me. After showing up for my daughter’s soccer game and having to answer the question several times if I was hung over, I had texted him as he had a similar story. We went back and forth – and he said it was nice to see me being more myself.
It is nice being more myself. Like I told TL, I was getting sick of me – and how I was feeling and reacting to things. If I was getting sick of it, I can only imagine how the world was seeing me. I can only be thankful that those I love are understanding and supportive and, most importantly, tolerant. It is nice to be more like the me that I like.