Our Conversation over Beers

“Are you okay with how I’m changing?”

It was a legitimate question to my husband as I am not the same person he married. The last couple years have been a serious exploration of who I am with the past year being a series of events that have made me wonder if, perhaps, this is my midlife crisis.

“Of course I am. Why do you ask?”

So I explained.  The playmates. The solo play. The group play. Going out for beers on a more regular basis.  Doing my own thing versus just being at home with the girls. The list goes on.

He merely laughed at me.

“You are finally being you. There isn’t the family side of Emmy or the friend side of Emmy or the wife side of Emmy or the blogger Emmy or the work Emmy.  There is just you.  The Emmy I have always seen. The Emmy I always wished people could see because it was the one I have always seen. I’m just glad you are letting others see the person I’ve always enjoyed.”

I feel very lucky to be married to someone who understands. Who is not resenting me for it, but celebrating the fact I am having these discoveries.

16 Comments Add yours

  1. You are a lucky man. I think both of you have grown and you have grown together and that growth is great.
    What a statement to say that you are the person he has always seen—beautiful.

  2. Sa says:

    You too are an inspiration on how to grow together. Thank you for this post!

  3. IveyLane says:

    I’m also finding this to be quite amazing. I’ve always loved my husband but was concerned that if he knew “the real me” he wouldn’t love me. What a joy to find that isn’t true; not only is our love richer, but even with the surealness that swinging brings to the mix, we our more authentic together than ever before.

    You guys rock –

  4. frances says:

    You two are so lucky. Well said G.

  5. Babe Lincoln says:

    He’s a keeper (and so are you, of course!). Keep on your journey; with a strong relationship behind you, you’ll go far!

  6. What a fabulous thing to say! Yay for both of you!

  7. Vixen says:

    I think you and I are going through similarities in our lives. And I have joked with my best friend that I think it’s my mid life crisis. *I’m* happy with who I am and am becoming. But my husband, while accepting it, it feels a bit begrudgingly at times.

    It’s awesome to read what you and your husband have and how understanding he seems.


  8. Hubman says:

    I have to admit, there have been times when I’ve read your swinging adventures and not knowing about Garbonzo’s adventures, I’ve wondered how he feels and how you guys are maintaining balance.

    I should have known better than to worry!

  9. Joker_SATX says:

    Kudos! This is a WIN!

  10. Osbasso says:

    He’s a keeper.

  11. 13messages says:

    I love the love you two have for each other.

  12. It’s amazing when you can grow with someone like that. You’re living the dream girl!


  13. Just me... says:

    Am just beginning to be more involved with someone who ‘gets’ me.. Even when I don’t really ‘get’ myself!!
    It makes me grin like an idiot just thinking about it!!
    Congrats and Enjoy!! :):)

  14. Ms Scarlett says:

    This is a conversation (over beers or otherwise) that I could never have with my husband. I already know he’s not okay with how I’m changing.

    Too bad for him!!

    I love how you two support and love each other – no matter what! And I really love how Garbanzo really *sees* you.


  15. Cheeky Minx says:

    The unconditional love and acceptance here is so very beautiful…

  16. I’m glad that you both maintain your balance. You are an awesome couple.

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